The Quotable Spankster:

“I’ll get my end, too.”
“Did you talk to Don?”
“Are you speaking in code?”
“I don’t know what ya’ll did in Arizona.”

Wow. A few days ago I was worrying about not getting enough telemarketers to call me, and now I have the pleasure of my first repeat performance. Mary Lou was so determined to get her sale, she called back! Now THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is a tenacious telemarketer!! (Or just a concerned citizen… trying to gather hard evidence of… what? Two guys having a beer in Arizona? Trading rare baseball cards? She’s clueless, but she knows this much: I’m mighty nervous about “people finding out.”)

Honestly, I just want to get paid…

If you haven’t already listened to my conversation with Mary Lou in “The Mary Lou Mystery Show, Pt. 1,” be sure to do so BEFORE listening to this one. And if you listen closely, and you’ll hear that one of the characters I talk about actually changes their gender DURING the conversation… not that Mary Lou noticed…

Brand Spanking Links: San Antonio, Get Paid, Codespeak, Prank Calls

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The Quotable Spankster:

“Stop Touching Your Money!”
“Do not kiss the dog’s butt!”
“Stop playin’, man.”

Antonio was a patient guy, much more than I had expected. Turns out he was the ideal candidate to meet Matilda. She’s kind of my female version of Dennis the Menace. On crack. Matilda makes that kid look like a regular Beaver Cleaver or choir boy. She’s just not well in the head. She’s also invaluable when I want to play the straight man in the spanking, as I did here.

To be honest, I think I enjoyed this spanking more than some of the others because Tony was able to share in the sheer horror of it all right alongside me. We were like brothers, equally disgusted by Matilda’s outrageousness. In the end he said he’d call back, but it’s been a few days now and I haven’t heard from him. :\ Perhaps he’s afraid of what she’ll do next? (And really, shouldn’t we all be?)

Brand Spanking Links: Money Tree, House Arrest, Martha Stewart, Stay-At-Home Dad, Texas, Toilets, Boiler Room, Prank Calls

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The Quotable Spankster:

“This is a phone company.”
“Do I need to talk to Don?”
“I just want to get paid.”

I’ll tell ya, for a while there I thought I had wound up on some kind of telemarketer Do Not Call List. After hitting the ground running with “Branson & Six Flags & Toilets, Oh My!“, I was eager to test my mad improv skillz once more on another unsuspecting contestant. Instead, I was left hanging, with nary a seller to spank.

Until today. And let me be the first to assure you: it was worth the wait.

Just when I thought I couldn’t top myself with Ol’ Man Toilet Cleaner from “Branson & Six Flags & Toilets, Oh My!“, an entirely new, neurotic character bubbled to the surface and had a chat with Mary Lou. Or a complete meltdown…. whichever you want to call it… (I call it dang funny)

Brand Spanking Links: Arizona, Arizona 2, Get Paid, Uncontrolled Sobbing, Prank Calls

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