The Quotable Spankster:

“Chef Master!!!”
“I’m the guy who can drink everything.”
“Kangaroo blood, both refrigerated and fresh…”
“Basically, if I can blend it, I’ll drink it.”
“I’m like, heck, I’m a real man.“
“If I get some Saran Wrap or something, she’ll kiss me… maybe a little tongue.”

Selling water filtration services? People, you just called the wrong guy.

If you listen closely you can hear good Charlotte actually gulp when I mention “how it all started” with the kangaroo blood down in Australia. Then as I’m tellin’ my tall (and I do mean TALL) tale, you can hear another lady laughing in the background! Whatever happened to privacy, people? Maybe I should just expect all incoming telemarketer calls to be party lines from now on.

I enjoyed mentioning my competition and the current World Record holder - Kevin Sphankderhoffer. Any chance I get, I think I’ll try to work his name into future conversations. It’s just fun to say. Come on, try it - Sphankderhoffer. (You KNOW you’re gonna be saying that the rest of the week…)

Sphankderhoffer.

Mining the ever-expanding Vault of Telemarketer Wisdom, Charlotte taught me this: I no longer have to fear drinking bleach, because apparently I already do. ‘Course, once I got her goin’ on that I could hardly get a word in edgewise. Still, the conversation was fun and her reaction entertaining, so I figure it’s worthy of Spankdom for now.

Brand Spanking Links: Hummer, iPod, BBQ, Coupons, Guinness Book of World Records, Australia, Kangaroo Wrestling, How NOT to wrestle with a Kangaroo, Sleeper Hold, Saran Wrap, iPod Nano, Prank Calls, Pranks, Spanking Telemarketers, TeleSpank.com

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