The Quotable Spankster:

“She put the turtle in the toilet and flushed it!”
“Oh my… goodness… gracious…”
“I’m not used to seeing so much… blood…”
“You know, if it’s a turtle bite it might take a while…”

Wouldn’t you know it? Matilda just can’t seem to stay out of trouble! As if playing kissy-poo with an unsuspecting dog a few weeks ago wasn’t enough, NOW she’s moved on to torturing even MORE helpless creatures! But this time, Nature Bites Back.

With a vengeance.

Thankfully, Helen was there to calmly give me the advice and support I needed. Talk about a timely telemarketer! What WOULD I have done if she HADN’T been on the phone, huh? Perhaps it’s time we all said a quiet word of thanks for the telemarketers in our lives, shall we?

Brand Spanking Links: Magazines, Attack of the Turtle, First Aid for Turtle Bites

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The Quotable Spankster:

“Stop Touching Your Money!”
“Do not kiss the dog’s butt!”
“Stop playin’, man.”

Antonio was a patient guy, much more than I had expected. Turns out he was the ideal candidate to meet Matilda. She’s kind of my female version of Dennis the Menace. On crack. Matilda makes that kid look like a regular Beaver Cleaver or choir boy. She’s just not well in the head. She’s also invaluable when I want to play the straight man in the spanking, as I did here.

To be honest, I think I enjoyed this spanking more than some of the others because Tony was able to share in the sheer horror of it all right alongside me. We were like brothers, equally disgusted by Matilda’s outrageousness. In the end he said he’d call back, but it’s been a few days now and I haven’t heard from him. :\ Perhaps he’s afraid of what she’ll do next? (And really, shouldn’t we all be?)

Brand Spanking Links: Money Tree, House Arrest, Martha Stewart, Stay-At-Home Dad, Texas, Toilets, Boiler Room, Prank Calls

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